Red carnation day

Today I have earned my chemo red carnation.

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At Oxford, when you do your exams, you wear a carnation. White for the first, pink for the middle, red for the last. Those people who walk out of Exam Schools with a red carnation get showered with champagne and gifts. You know that you have got through something monumental and very difficult. You know that the light had appeared and the tunnel is behind you.

I feel like that today. Despite the challenges ahead, I feel that I have passed through fire and brimstone. I have leaned over the precipice. I have stared into the abyss. And I have got myself through. With family, with friends, with strangers, with amazing doctors and nurses, and with sheer gut and determination, I have gone straight through a very tough chemo regime with no breaks, no hospitalisation and only a few tears.

I am winning. Not Genghis. I will triumph. Not Genghis. I will go on.

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